Friday, July 25, 2008

P90X Best Quotes and Moments

As many of you know, I somehow duped myself into doing P90X this summer. If you're unfamiliar with P90x, it's a workout routine that you'll see on a whole bunch of late night infomercials. It's 90 straight days of working out for 60-90 minutes per day. And it's meant for people that are in way better shape than I am. Honestly, I am hoping that my "after" photo looks as good as most "before" photos in their advertisement.

To give you an idea of how sad it is I'm doing this, I was telling Cousin Eric today that my goal is to be able to do one honest to goodness pull up by the end. Even sadder is that I've never been able to do one in my life and it would be an amazing accomplishment.


Since the workouts consume 60-90 minutes of my day... everyday... that's all I've been talking about lately. Just the other day I made it to the halfway point. Now, you'd probably expect me to talk about my numbers and give some sort of half way progress report with pounds and inches lost and strength gained. But that's not my style. Nor are my numbers all that impressive. In fact, I was about to say that I'll give a full report after 90 days, but I don't want to make any promises.

What I did want to do, however, was come up with some sort of "Top Ten" type list for those who have done P90X. This only really makes sense for those who have done the workouts since you've spent dozens of hours with Tony Horton and are starting to feel like he's living with you. So, my apologies to those who haven't done P90X - I know this all seems elitist and exclusionary.

There are so many classic moments in these videos that I want to make this some sort of "Work in Progress" where people can submit their own "P90X moments". So, if you have a P90X story/moment/favorite quote, send them to nachomaster@nachosrule.com. In the meantime, here's my preliminary list to give you an idea of what I'm getting at here:



- Just about halfway through the yoga video, Tony talks about doing the best downward dog of your life. He then proceeds to say, "They're coming in to shoot the cover of Downward Dog Magazine." I laughed the first time. Now I look forward to it as inspiration.

- Just to make you feel worse about yourself, one of they guys in the Plyometrics (jump training) video has a prosthetic leg.

- Phase 2 brings all sorts of harder push ups and pull ups (not that I could do a whole lot of regular ones to begin with). At the end of the Phase 2 pull up day, Tony talks about doing pull ups that are easier for you if you're "wasted" and the ones you don't like if you still have energy. Needless to say I'm beyond wasted every time, hoping to do maybe 6 pull ups with the aid of a chair. Then smiley chick on the right in the video says, "I'm going to do corn cob pull ups." For those unfamiliar, corn cob pull ups are pull ups where, at the top of the pull up, you move your body right, then left, then away from the bar, then towards the bar, before going down again.

- Does Tony really need to do the pterodactyl every time he does the big reverse arm circles? Wasn't it enough in one video? If my count is right, he does it in three.

- Since you do the Ab Ripper X routine more than any other (three times a week), everything gets magnified. A few minutes before the end, Tony walks in from the back, acting all macho, slowing saying, "Ab.... Ripper... X..." For whatever reason I hate that.

- Tony's dad really threw some no hitters? He says so at the end of the Plyometrics video. Who's his dad? I actually checked the all time no-hitter list for the major leagues and there's no Horton on there. What's he talking about? Slow pitch softball?

- Thanks for the P90X recovery drink shameless promotion at the end of every workout.

- What are the odds that Tony and Dreya Webber are/were hooking up? Even odds? Big Brown 1-5 kind of odds?

- I love those pot stirrer cool downs at the end. Tony always asks what kind of soup people are stirring. During Phase 2, Phil says, "I'm stirring up trouble." Tony is obviously upset that somebody else was trying to be funny. Phil's my new hero.

- Speaking of Phil, he gets verbally massacred during the Stretch video. I somehow have a feeling that they filmed the previous pot stirring video first and Tony decided to get revenge here by pointing out how inflexible Phil is.

Thanks to newly discovered Cousin-in-Law Chris M. for some more fantastic P90X moments...

- "X me baby"

- After a tough set he'll look at the computer and say "Now that's.....P90X"

- "The Georgeous Dreya Weber"

- "German Potato Soup!"

- "How many are you going to do Phil?, How many are you going to do Morraine". I'll still be doing pushups when both of you are done". What an ass!

- (Send more and I'll keep this list updated)


414 comments:

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Anonymous said...

I too find Dreya super annoying, especially when she bows when he introduces her as the inventor of the Dreya roll. And then she thinks she's super cool when she jumps in the air and spins and does all that.

In Kenpo, when Tony H. starts the cool down part, look at the other Tony. He does this lame thing where he pushes his arms down and looks at Wesley thinking Wesley will be looking at him and they can both share a chuckle. Instead, Wesley's not paying attention, and Marine Tony just looks like a tool. Especially since he's constantly smiling and laughing.

Anonymous said...

I have to say I really like this workout but I agree dreya is annoying with all the hoping around and the towel boy is annoying, my all time favorite is I workout for the recovery drink,he says he works out for the recovery drink! why not just make a damn drink and drink it. You barely workout anyways cause you always stopping to show something or when it's hard you bail so quickly to check on the kids. Just saying.

Anonymous said...

Awww Tony!
Well, I just did back and biceps today so I guess I'd have to choose:

"I think I am a 45 man"

But my all time favorite is when the guy in the back is trying to slack a bit. Tony says something like, "Dude - I'm at 45s" and the guy in the back increases his weight. Hilarious! Too bad the girl in that video is a complete and annoying suck-up, because I love the other two guys.

Anonymous said...

The guy with the prosthetic leg in Pyo X is the comedian Erik Stolhanske. He's part of Broken lizard and stars in Beerfest, Super Troopers,etc.
Can't believe he wasn't properly introduced.

Anonymous said...

I read this thread tonight for the first time before doing Back and Biceps. I love P90X and all of Tony's crazy lines. But I'll crack up now every time I work out listening to him after reading this blog.

It cracks me up during Back and Biceps when Tony yells "GIVE IT TO ME BOBBY!!"

Tony rules!

Anonymous said...

OOOOoooo... "How many are you gonna do? I am gonna do 20!"(Tony gets to his 20th pull-up at the end of "Chest and Back" and completes his reps with the best line of all tapes."


"Oh, and one more. The cherry on Top!"

Anonymous said...

I don't believe it - I read the entire thing and no one put the "this is real DNA removal" - what the heck is that? As far as I know, DNA - can NOT be removed.

I just love my mornings with Tony. My family laugh at it, but I think they enjoy some of the lines to. I hear them quoting them. My 7 year old walks around doing the X.

As for Drya, yah I have always wondered what was up there.

I miss Tony when I take a couple of months off to do other things - glad I am back on the P90 for now and working back up to the X in P90X.

Anonymous said...

The face Tony makes as he turns to the camera after describing Kenpo X workout...that one makes me laugh every time!

Anonymous said...

Ab ripper X: I'm gonna finish up with you kids.

Anonymous said...

I really dont think Tony was mean to Sophia. He was right in that her form is slightly off a few times. Also, her form could have been wrong purposefully for teaching purposes. Tony likes to be the fittest guy in the room, but never seems mean spirited. I agree she is hot though!

I like how the music picks up sometimes when Tony stops teaching and rejoins the workout! Like he triumphantly exercises with us again!

"Oh that feels good in so many fantastic places!" "Oh mommy!"

Anonymous said...

I love all these comments.

I just finished day 73 today and practically know the videos by heart.

"OOOOH THAT'S CUSHIER!!!"

"I recommend... foot spray..."

And in legs/back during toe roll iso lunges I love it when Tony is pretending like he's falling asleep and he says something like, "GET LOWWWWWWWWW... ten... eleven.... MMMMMMMMMMMMMMTWELVE"

LOL I crack up all the time and lose my balance.

Anonymous said...

when tony says joe bovino is his twin, Im just thinking how much hotter joe is than tony.

also, sophias ugly! i dont understand the fans. i had to rewatch legs & back to see who you guys were talking about.

John said...

that "Frog or Frahg", lol... makes me thing bad things. that position is not an everyday natural thing... just saying... just started W9 here! i'ma keep on bringin it! =)

Anonymous said...

I think some of you guys have too much time on your hands. I have cycled thru P90X twice now, and I think it's the best "workout in a box" on the market. Sophia is beautiful as is Audra. Dreya is frenetic, but that's just her style. Adam's physique is amazing! I find the shortest routine (the one with the corn-cob pull-ups, 52 min) could be a bit longer to allow time to change weights. That's the one I have to stop sometimes to change the weight of my adjustable dumbbells. The only comment I care about is Tony's claim that his dad "threw a couple of no -hitters". I would expect a comment like that to be followed by something specific, like "Hartford Roosters (or other team name), 1967." Because he does not qualify the remark, I think it's baloney. I also don't care for the constant plugs for the "recovery drink". Minor complaints, though. I enjoy the workouts.

Anonymous said...

I read all the comments and can't believe nobody has mentioned this one yet:

In plyo during the gap jumps:
Over the river...
and THROUGH the WOODS...
to GRANDmother's HOUSE...

Dreya is kind of annoying but whatever. Sophia is only so-so to me. I want to insert myself into Audra and Shawna though... mmmm

Anonymous said...

tony may be corny to most but he certainly has helped a lot of people in def need.
i doubt he's pumping anything else like people say..i am a firm believer that it's just good ol' P90X, so if you on't believe in it and people think it's just crap then why get on here an waste your time.

he has changed so many lives and of course saved a lot of my experience as well, so big "T" keep it up dog!!

Anonymous said...

My favorite was when they are doing the chest n back workout..close grip pullups..tony hangs from the bar and goes..."I want a cherry on top right here!" lol the he goes,.."These guys are writing down their information..Bobby's writing down, never do that with Tony again" LOL

dannyb said...

I didn't see anybody mention one of my favorites.

"This is flexing, This is pointing, flexing, pointing...lets flex!"

Anonymous said...

I like it in Chest, Shoulder, Tri when Tony asks Davy (substitute teacher) how many of something he just did and Davy responds with a smile and a number matching what Phil just did. Tony immediately picks up on it and says "as long as you didn't do more than ... " pointing his thumb over at Phil. Something tells me Phil is a bad ass.

Anonymous said...

Joel Horton, Sept. 1967
http://www.cbssports.com/mlb/history/lists/nohitters_al

Anonymous said...

In regard to all the comments about food. Remember that Tony is a vegetarian.

".. mines a lobster bisque, but not for me."

Sameer said...

"That's a short uncle"

Anonymous said...

The workouts are fantastic and very challenging...the leader on the other hand acts like a chauvinistic womanizer which I find annoying.

Anonymous said...

Kenpo X:

"Tip of the day: no bang, no bang."

LOL

Anonymous said...

I forget what workout it is. Tony has says "wait for me, I wanna go" (in a strange voice saying go)while doing side tri rise

Anonymous said...

woooooooo slippy!!!

Anonymous said...

does anyone realize during legs and back dreya's groucho quote, is in fact, a quote by chico to groucho during night at the opera. i make my walks look better than hers because it makes me mad everytime.

AMG said...

Scotty in Chest & Back has an odd way of saying things: "Scotty, how many are you going to do?" Scotty says very enunciated "Tweh-nty."

Ab Ripper X: "Legs are up... To-ge-ther." I say that with him every time.

In the Core Synergistics stretching Tony gets a lisp while bent over: "You're gonna feel thum'n." He means to say something.

"I'm done chattin. 5-4, 3-2..."

It's funny in Cardio X Tony says "We're gonna burn all that goop, that grime, that nasty GRISTLE, 'cuz we don't want it." But in Legs & Back he says Erik is "pure gristle from head to toe.."

Why is Tony so freaking competitive? "Mine went in, yours missed!"

Anonymous said...

This is so funny...I laughed so hard....but

you guys should leave Dreya alone... She's not that annoying... I think you guys are just jealous that she looks way to good for a 40 year-old woman; and she looks better than your girlfriend/wife....

as for Tony, I think he's awesome... the best of the best in the fitness' world....

Anonymous said...

"And now...down for your vinyasa."

I want to punch him every time he says that. hahahaha

Connor said...

Ok, So I just spent the last hour laughing my butt off.

Gotta love:
Hamburgers...Bad.
Fries...Bad.
Coke..oh no I said it...BAD!

I am so happy to see other people hate Draya Webber! I want to mule kick her when she takes a bow and when she tells Tony, "I push from the heel of my foot." Tony, "I don't care!"

Love in Yoga he goes from Downward dog leg raise to another position and he stands there blabbin on and everyone else is stuck in leg raise for like 3 min b/c he never told them to change.

God I could go on and on!

Anonymous said...

This board is too funny!

I really like Tony and don't find him annoying (After reading these posts, I guess I should be thankful for that!). The only person who I find annoying is Wesley Idol from Kenpo. I really have no idea why, but he just annoys me.

All during Kenpo, Tony will say something like "we're doing this 15 times" and then the little counter on the video will say 30.

"german potato soup"

I always crack up at Tony's groucho marx impression during the crouching walk. He just looks weird and possessed, kind of like at the intro to the Kenpo video.

I'm pretty sure that Adam from Core/ Ab Ripper and Yoga is super human.

Sophia and Audra are definitely the hottest.

"Over the river, and through the woods..."

Anonymous said...

I did not notice but any comments about the fact that some of the cameramen are a bit heavy in the belly. I bit funny but there is a info commercial with one of themwho notices that he is out of shap and ends up doing P90x

Anonymous said...

Wow...Dreya's not necessarily my favorite but a lot of you are being way to hard on her.

"get ready...cuz it's coming!"
"merciless...merciless man!"
"Nobody SAID this was EASY!"
"Watch out for Pam, she'll knock you into the river."
"You're gonna love the first break."
"Come on frog-boy!"
"Look at leapy boy!"
"Gimme the double double...beep boop!"

"Ring a ding ding...RING a ding ding ding! I think it needs some oil."
"Tony too...the stud of the world."
"Oooh, I got a crack!"
"Mister Haas, bring your legs to me."
"Shauna, if you knock that water bottle over one more time..."
"I gotta beat Erik, you know what I'm sayin'?!"
"I'm gonna take a nap."
"Takin' care of bidness...takin' care of bidnessssss."
"How do you know what to DO if you don't know what ya DID?!"
"There's no pain...it's all fun."

Anonymous said...

Kudos Tony! Great workout. Great program. Totally changed my body. I was paying trainers a lot of money to do parts of this program once a week.

My favorite comment that I don't see:

You shouldn't be doin' yoga if you don't have a mat (with great emphasis on the T in mat).

Anonymous said...

"Drop down in Warrior 2 there, Mr. Haas. This is Yoga X, my brotha"

Anonymous said...

I don't think "Pam the Blam" likes her nickname. She doesn't know how to handle Tony's constant nickname. I think in one video, he doesn't introduce her as "Blam" and instead says something actually complimentary and she seems relieved. I don't blame her.

Every time he says "Scissor" with his fingers during the ab ripper reminds me of a South Park video with Mr Garrison turns into a woman and tries to figure out lesbian sex.

I HATE it when he says "Imagine if you've got to do a 100 of these!" It completely ruins my goal everytime, so i have to zone out when i know he's going to say it.

BTW - Tony can't hold Yoga still poses worth shit. So, i feel better about Yoga most days even tho its the most dreaded workout of the week. At least with Plyo, you know your done in an hour. Yoga seems like forever!

"Do you guys have tickets? To the show?"

"Crawl, like a woorrmmmmm."

"Wanna see gorgeous?" circles his face with that ridiculous flirty grin "Not here, my back"

I think he just tortures his people with the "bannana/superman" since he's "wearing a pack". Makes me want to rip off his pack everytime.

Anonymous said...

"You got your strengths, and you got your weaks."

"Ain't you ain't liftin' no more than me!"

Anonymous said...

"Tip of the day: Don't smash your face, let someone else do that".

WTF!?!? How about not letting anyone smash your face.

Dean said...

My two favorites:

"That's one short uncle!"

and

"How are you gonna know what to do unless you know what you did?"

LOL

Justin said...

Does anyone know what Tony's saying when he's stretching his glute in Yoga X, with 7:20 left? He mumbles something, just talking to himself, and I have no idea what he's saying.. someone please help!

Anonymous said...

A few of my memorable quotes:


"We stumble, we fall, but we move, come on!!!" (Most inspiring Tony line to me)

"who's with me, which camera man" lol (Yoga I think)

"when you wanna keep up with these crazies, you pick it up!.... You pick it up!....." lol(Plyo)

"Supa man, Oh! Banana!!!" lol (Duno)

"Its time for the world famous, and my personal favorite!" (Can you say over-fucking-used?)

"Lookin' a little messy there Tony" .... "Yup I'm a little messy, you know me" (Phase 2 DVDs)

"Look at his face, that is an intense face right there" (Tony talking about Phil) Phil was probably thinking, no Tony I just have to take a dump.

"Dont make fun of my left hand pitch" (Plyo)

"Jah-Men Poe-Tay-Toe Soop!!!" ahahaha(By Marren the German girl)

"If you start feeling squirly you know you're done." (Duno)

At the end of Legs/Back DVD during cool down when they are doing pot stirrs , The guy who lives on a boat mentions putting pumpkin in the soup like three times and totally gets ignored by everyone. (I always laugh at that part and mumble "you guys hear something? me niether")



Things I've noticed :

On the Sit ups during Ab Ripper X, when he stops doing them to talk to the camera, it's very annoying and sometimes messes me up.

The timing is off on the first exercise during ab ripper x.

The one legged guy is Erik Stolhanske a successful movie star most of you might recognize as "Rabbit" from the movie Super Troopers.

At the end of a workout, that guy who comes on and talks about the p90x recovery drink, and compares it to gatorade sounds like he's full of shit. Man I hate that infomercial.

My favorite of the girls were: Pam The Blam, Audra, and Shawna. Katie is my least favorite of the bunch because the sound of her voice and kiss-ass attitude just makes me want to kill babies.


I hate and love Tony, but his attitude alone helps me get through most of the workouts. Sure he can be a bit repetitive at times, but in the end I'd rather have the cheesey Tony than a serious silent ninja Tony. I also find that I do better at the exercises when I have the DVD playing on NORMAL MODE. Just learn to tune out most of the annoying phrases and you will do just fine.

By -E- 11/4/2010

Anonymous said...

A few of my memorable quotes:


"We stumble, we fall, but we move, come on!!!" (Most inspiring Tony line to me)

"who's with me, which camera man" lol (Yoga I think)

"when you wanna keep up with these crazies, you pick it up!.... You pick it up!....." lol(Plyo)

"Supa man, Oh! Banana!!!" lol (Duno)

"Its time for the world famous, and my personal favorite!" (Can you say over-fucking-used?)

"Lookin' a little messy there Tony" .... "Yup I'm a little messy, you know me" (Phase 2 DVDs)

"Look at his face, that is an intense face right there" (Tony talking about Phil) Phil was probably thinking, no Tony I just have to take a dump.

"Dont make fun of my left hand pitch" (Plyo)

"Jah-Men Poe-Tay-Toe Soop!!!" ahahaha(By Marren the German girl)

"If you start feeling squirly you know you're done." (Duno)

At the end of Legs/Back DVD during cool down when they are doing pot stirs , The guy who lives on a boat mentions putting pumpkin in the soup like three times and totally gets ignored by everyone. (I always laugh at that part and mumble "you guys hear something? me neither")


The one legged guy is Erik Stolhanske a successful actor most might recognize as "Rabbit" from the movie Super Troopers.

At the end of a dvd, the guy who comes on and talks about the p90x recovery drink sounds like he's full o' shit, hate that guy.

I hate and love Tony, but his attitude alone helps me get through the workouts. Sure he can be repetitive, but in the end I'd rather have cheesey Tony than a different Tony. I find I do better at the exercises when I have the DVD playing on NORMAL MODE. Just learn to tune out the annoying phrases and you will do fine.

By -E- on 11/4/2010

Anonymous said...

"Party's almost over. What a bummer."
Ughhh. I hate that

Anonymous said...

I loved this blog!

"There's no excuse!!!": Tony showing the Eric's hurted leg during Plyometrics work out.

The most beautiful girl is Katie, from "Back and Biceps", but I also like Pam "The Blam"!

Anonymous said...

I love all the weird awkward moments. A few people have mentioned the rebuffed hug attempt by the one guy in the background.

Another favorite is after the "Green bean soup? That sounds nasty, dude" you can hear the green bean guy trying to redeem himself for the next minute, repeating over and over again "Mmmmmm. Pumpkin carrot [or something like that] soup. That sounds good. Some pumpkin carrot." Everyone just ignores him.

Don't remember which workout, but the one in which Tony asks the one guy "You didn't look like this before, did you" and he says "No. I looked like Bobby" and then he goes over by Bobby Stevenson and tries to pat him on the back or something and Bobby just moves away like "don't touch me, jack@ss."

-Ken

Anonymous said...

Tony and Sophia are hookin up. That's why he's hard on her... she says during the pot stirrers that she's making lobster bisque and he get's all bitchy about it and then in a later video he says he's making lobster bisque for someone else... That's my 2 cents anyway. Or he's into the one legged guy (he's the hottest) and just trying to make it up to Sophia for being hard on her.

Anonymous said...

This page was a great idea. The only one of my favorite lines I haven't seen is "Add the arms, I mean, not Adam back there..." LOL.

It's surprising to see so much negativity, though. For me, it never gets annoying. Tony's not annoying, the repetition is not annoying, and the antics and personalities of the people in the videos arouse no anger. For me at least.

Those of you who seem to want to do so much "hating on" Dreya or Tony might want to consider seeing a psychologist or at least start reading some self-help books.

jiggy said...

How about in the yoga video when Audra is in Royal Dancer and Tony comes right up to her and waves his hands in front of her checking out her form and then says he isn't messing with her 'chi' . way to throw in the groovy yoga lingo Tone, but I can promise you that you did in fact mess with her chi.
I love these videos and look forward to the goofy bits every day. On week 4 and already seeing great results following NO diet plan!

Anonymous said...

dreya is the worst. she has this crazy intense psycho look on her face constantly. i wish he would put someone else in the front.
also Shawna in the yoga and stretch video irks me. what a f#@#ing show off.

Byron Wilson said...

I have gone through 5 rounds of P90x in the past 2 years. Planning to start again this January. Tony is the man, he is equal to Chuck Norris in my book! :)

"Just Push Play" is my personal favorite it sums up P90X! Like Woody Allan said, 80 percent of success is showing up! The days, I am tired and not at all into working out, Just Push Play is my mantra!

Unknown said...

I'm a fan of the workout. It's a difference-maker and VERY traveler-friendly.

Some of my favorites: the shoes are uniformly hideous; Dreya is the Saint Pauli Girl; Dominic is Christopher from the Sopranos; the shameless plugs for recovery drinks; "I'm a fan" of whatever is always amusing; Pam the "Blam" always seems vaguely amused by his characterizations but never acknowledges them or indicates fondness whatsoever; all modifiers are second class citizens unless the modified exercise is harder than the one everyone else is doing (e.g., big looped tubes or thicker tubes or having one one leg).

Anonymous said...

FUNNIEST THING IS WHEN PHIL FARTS ON THE X STRETCH!...When theres 9:17 left listen closely for the fartin phil.

Also in KenpoX at 45:03 sounds like tony says to wesley "Look at the big terd"

And in the intro dvd "how to bring it "when tony is discussing the program it looks like hes wearing a ton of mascara.

And yes I know I have too much free time on my hands...thank u very much

Anonymous said...

"oooh, that's cushier.."

Anonymous said...

'man o manischewitz'

is it just me or are the people on the back and biceps dvd the only ones who seem to have a pulse besides tony?

what is up with adam? his determination makes me uncomfortable.

and oh yeah, dreya needs a good side kick to the teeth.

Anonymous said...

i love how tony keeps calling the one dude 'loopboy' in the shoulders and arms workout. i'm not sure how, but it's so degrading.

Anonymous said...

During hamstring stretches in Yoga X...Don't eat your toes. And then, remember the foot spray.

Can't believe I didn't see others catch those...for some reason they always crack me up

Anonymous said...

Youre kinda a stupid dick dude, just do the freakin program stop rippin on Tony who gives a crap if he's an ass sometimes just shut up I hate people like you

Anonymous said...

Lighten up Francis! Just havin some fun. I love that Dreya is claiming inventing the Dreya Roll. I believe I was doing those in gymnastics class 20 years ago. nice try... she is an amazing aerialist who has worked with Madonna and Pink, but she still irks the crap out of me.
Also, bothers me that both Wesley and Vanessa in the Kenpo video are not in such great shape..not so motivating. If I go thru this whole shebang and am still that flabby I swear I'll sue.

Anonymous said...

I love Tony. The workouts...the little quotes... p90x has changed my life as well as my husbands and out 11 yr old we do it as a family and its made such a big diff in how we eat and live my two year old even jumps in with her own way :) so ty tony thank u p90x we love it.... need some shirts though like someone else says with the quotes on them i wld buy them all

Anonymous said...

OMG, lmao, but it hurts cuz I just finished ab ripper X!

My fav is in Legs when TOny asks blonde guy how many pull up he has done and the guy says 22. Tony then goes back to the pull up bar and rips out a few more just so that he will have done more puul ups than blonde guy!

And yes Dreya is so annoying, and so is her Dreya roll and her Dreya lunges. I'm probably just jealous though.

Love Tony, love the work out, and love whomever started this blog!! Too funny!

Anonymous said...

Oh... My... God...

I just looked up Maren's "filmography" That chick has done like 80 hardore films. She seemed so innocent.

" Uh...I don't think that's potato soup on her chin"

Anonymous said...

And one-legged Erik from Plyo is the star of Beer Fest! What's up TOny? Too stuck up to give a nod to P90X's only noteworthy actor?

Anonymous said...

Didn't read this whole thread, so sorry if these are repeats:

"That's a short uncle"

"Hey, wild man! We're gonna do some stretches"

"Johnny Stiff"

"Tip of the Day: Don't smash your face! Let someone else do that"

I love whenever Tony gets pissed that someone is doing more reps or weight than him, like Dreya with the side-tri-rises in the shoulders and arms workout. You can tell he's super competitive.

"Diamonds of gold"...umm, I'd prefer my diamonds to be made of diamonds.

Anonymous said...

Tony is annoying but it helps get you through it. Here are my favorites (or annoying moments) -

- When Tony asks what others are using for weight and then he stops to get more weight, and then stops after a few reps to "check on the kids"
- how he rags on Phil during stretching and then tries to be nice to him at the end ("Phil, you look a hundred more times more flexible now, great job")
- all his ass-kissing of Wesley during Kenpo ("look how tight that hook is")
- "at em, not Adam"
- how he pretends to be hurt when pretending to punch marine Tony in Kenpo
- his obvious foot in mouth when describing how the third blocking move is like "punching the corner of the room" after that is how he described the second blocking move
- how he realizes that being a substitute teacher is nothing to be proud of with a condescending "thank you for that"
- all his lame references to Forest Gump when ever he mentions buttocks. He says the word and you just know it is coming. There is one time that he says buttocks and does not mention Gump and that is a relief
- the really lame references to "the wave" and the over the top fake yell of the guy in the back pretending that the stretch is the wave
- how he always seems to forget info about the older women in "Chest, Shoulders and Triceps". I think they stopped the tape and filled him in because he then has a discussion about her daughter.
- "Semper Fi!, but I wont say it cause I was never a marine"
- "bringing it to the people", bringing what?
- in plyo when he says during the calf exercise that it is good to get in rhythm with someone, or get out of rhythm with them. What?
- his "BLAM" with the fist pump
- I am going to Tony!!!" Like a warning to Tony in Kenpo that the annoying Tony is coming back to check on mhim

Many more - all run

Anonymous said...

This is the greatest blog ever. About to take my first photo and have been promising my girlfriend to give my best "Dreya crazy-exercise-eyes" pose for the shot. The Groucho Marx is by far the worst, or if you love pain, best moment, hands down. For mental toughness, I watch that joke on replay for 1 minute or 20 reps, whichever comes first (make sure to write it down people!).

Josh "The Blam"

Anonymous said...

Does any one find the karate man, in kempo annoying ? I can't think of his name but he "helped Tony create this video". He's always doing these karate gestures with his hands like he is Bruce lee or something. I find it very annoying because it doesn't even look like he's working hard, just trying to be fancy with his moves. I m surprised no one else mentioned it. I love Tony though. This program is very much "x like" .

Anonymous said...

"He's skating he's from belgium!"
Love the "tips of the day" lol!

"now if you want to you can just take a beak like this, if I'm doing it so can you, why not, what the he'll lifes good"

"I got shot in the buttox"

"that a short uncle"

"I like to do fancy hands".

"do your best and what every body?" total silence from everyone in yoga x lol!

"gives me 6 extra inches so I can go super deep"

Ah these all make me lol, makes p90x a little more fun!

Anonymous said...

Great program. My wife and I kept each other going for 90 tough days. This board is a hoot. Good grist.

Katie's shrill announcement that "I am going to do corncobs" warrants a corncob alright.

It is tough to watch Erik the boat guy get gunned down by Sophia. Talk about crashing and burning.

At the end of legs and back, Tony is doing a chest stretch with Dreya and Sofia and exhorts them to "Spready spready!" Don't have to be Fellini to figurte that one out.

The fat camera man loses it filming Sofia, focusing from her backside before spinning around to shoot the white board. I think the poor guy must have stroked out at the view and lost control of the camera!

Anonymous said...

Is it just me or is Pam ready to deck Tony if he calls her Blam one more time?

Anonymous said...

If u watch micheal Jackson this is it. You'll see drea. She is like chief arialist or something. Also I am in love with Sophia. Wish she was on more vid's. But I love this p90x community it's like we're all tied together by tony's corny inspirational ramblings.

Anonymous said...

I like the plyo routine when Tony says " OK, we have two legs".....and the camaraman zooms in to the guy with the prosthetic leg, and he has this look on his face which is just priceless

also in yoga when you're going triangle pose on the second leg and tony says " extend the leg AGAIN...he sounds like a flamboyant gay guy

Anonymous said...

Corn cob girl---You're ANNOYING.

Shawna in yoga x has the greatest butt in the history of mankind. I stare at it the entire routine

Joe and Bobby are not your triplets Tony, they are both a foot taller than you.

I LOVE daniel Haas, especially when he wears the hat and gets yelled at. I looked at IMDB though and his only acting credit is P90X, so I guess Tony asking people to hire him didn't do much for his acting career.

Drea is a horseface

The substitute teacher gets a "thanks for that" from Tony. WTF

Anonymous said...

How about in Legs and Back:

"Sophias not using, weights that is"

Anonymous said...

Legs and Back - Sophia lets go of the bands and they swing and smack Tony right in the face.

Too many Tony-isms to even start.

Anonymous said...

Creepiest comment: "She's got the skin of a 5-year old" when referring to the redhead and how "lucky" her fiancee is.

Anonymous said...

I can't stand that red haired chick in kenpo, she over exaggerates every move she does with the leg pivots it pisses me off. I cant stand anyone in kenpo. But over all I like Tony and his cheesy saying P90X is a great work out

Anonymous said...

BEST site ever - I was doubled over laughing when I found this! My hubby's favorite is when Tony says, "Or, heels to the heavens (lisp)" during Ab Ripper X. It annoys my husband to no end, so now when I comes on, I can't help but laugh. Also love the Cawwww!

Wesley in Kenpo is such a doofus. I find it hard to believe that he helped come up with the workout.

And Dreya...SUPER annoying! If I have to hear, "she flies through the air..." I'm going to barf. I think Kenpo is my favorite because there's no Dreya!

"Dominic, you want me to yell at you?" Uh, no.

Guessler said...

First off, I like or at least don't mind everyone in the videos. If you bother (not that you need to) looking up the X'ers background info, the image they project makes more sense. "Morraine" (Actually Maren) is a porn actress. The creeped out expressions you see her making when the camera is in her face look like products of the industry.

Anyway, not sure if I saw these posted but here goes.
Legs & Back:
"Lentil Soup; lean, no fat, no poison in that!"
"Focus on my little calves! And 4."
"Sealey Tiles. Here we go!"
"I'll come to your house [if] your heels hit the deck."

Anonymous said...

Love this web site!

A couple of favorites from Yoga X that I don't think have been posted yet:

At the end of the moving postures, Tony says "The hard work's over ... sort of." Yeah, with 43.48 minutes still to go, Crane still ahead ...

During a hamstring stretch he encourages you to stretch further my saying "Grab on to your ... well, I'd say socks but we're not wearing socks."

Anonymous said...

Love the Workout so far 2 weekd in.

"this is real sweat, real people"

Jophus said...

I LOVE P90X, but can't stand anything about Dreya. Here's a fun spot, though--at the end of the Core Synergistics DVD, when Tony's setting up the glute stretch, he tells everyone to put their right ankle over their left leg. Dreya CLEARLY points at her legs and does the "L is for left" with her hand before getting in position. She's retarded. Hilarious.

Anonymous said...

This is awesome. I thought I was alone. Look, for a guy we have to live with for 90 hours over 90 days, he does a pretty good job of getting us thriught the torture.

Here's mine: During the lead in to Kenpo when he is balck and white anD talking about Kenpo, he puts up his fists and turns to camera with the cheesiest look.

Also, he is a hybrid of Steve Carroll from the Office and Jim Cary.

Anonymous said...

“I’m going to try not to say anything for a few minutes, haha yea right! I got scared for a minute there…”

My husband gets really upset that the horizontal punches are called vertical punches. If they were vertical we would all be fist pumping to the cheesy music!

In Kenpo I ALWAYS laugh when the black Tony does his practice claw and then gives it so much prowless emotion during the workout. And the redhead – Vanessa, no more close ups please. Her favorite are the vertical (horizontal) punches at the end which I always have to repeat “my favorite!” And then I imagine black Tony saying “I don’t care” but I think he says something like bring it on.

Also in Kenpo Wesley always speeds up whatever he’s doing when Tony comes to talk to him and has the most annoying smirk when he knows Tony is going to speed up the vertical punches. And Tony sometimes starts the double time earlier than normal which throws the whole crew off.

Why does tomato soup have to be low sodium but Tony can have Tomato basil soup?

Tony is one in a set of triplets, Joe Povino and Bobby Stevenson – they all walk around town side by side and no one knows one from the other. But they all really want to be like Daniel Hauss.

To Eric, Belgium guy “is that the accent dude?” the guy says not even close and then says yea, that’s good. Then Tony says thanks buddy!

Look at those triceps Joe! They’re like diamonds of gold.

“Look at my tiny little baby calves.”

Dreya makes orgasm noises during legs and back and Tony says “listen to them noises.”

Tony likes to shake his left fist before he throws a punch like he’s gathering energy.

He says damn at one point and then corrects himself to say darn.

Anonymous said...

I find it weird on Plyo, during stretch: "all right, we've got 2 legs, let's do the other one.."

Uh, Tony check over your right shoulder.

Anonymous said...

Dreya could kick everyones ass. Just saying. I wouldn't want to mess with her.

In Ab Ripper " They are working hard, I know you are!" Then Tony lets out this really goofy laugh!

Anonymous said...

My favorite comment of the whole series is during back and biceps when they are doing strip set and he asks bobby stevens what weight he's gonna start with and he was about to say 40 or something like that and tony says WRONG!!!!

Plus, bow to boat he says 5 sets and you only do four.

sneaky lunges he says 20 and you do 22

I thought I was the only one that noticed adam does no more than 12 prison cell pushups.

I have the moves in ab ripper memorized so I haven't watched that video in over a year.

I'm on my 4th round and I can pretty much do them all without the dvds. sometimes I just play them to hear the funny stuff.


"happiness is this right here"

"squat jacks, funs over"

"smash yo' face"

"Core synergistics, talk about getting into shape"

Unknown said...

My husband and I laugh every time during Chest Shoulders Triceps when Tony asks the older lady Laura "are you feeling burn Laura, talk to me" and she responds like she's mad "I'M FEELING IT" and Tony mumbles this weird mmmMMMmmmm sound as he walks away from her. During the same workout Tony is introducing the substitute teacher in the back "We call him Dave, Davey, Big Dave" later on during a tricep exercise Tony calls Dave "Shawn"

Adrian Stclaire said...

This post was so good it had me going back and rewatching the moment of Ab Ripper where we get to see Tony's macho talk. What's so great about Tony's gift of gab is that for the first week of P90X when I'm actually sweating during these workouts and not just wasting time standing around watching it with my hands on my hips, its not so bad. The bad thing about it is that once Im on the second week and looking for any reason to quit, his voice is the easiest reason to cite.

Anonymous said...

Its so funny when he says dont bite your toe nails in the cobbler pose of yoga x haha i recommend a foot spray lol hilarious :)
no krispycreme in the house hehehe his cheesy jokes crackes me up lol

Anonymous said...

I know it's "out of fashion" to poke fun of the handicapped, but man, Eric from the Plyo video moves and looks like one of those ventriloquist puppets.

I keep waiting for a giant Jeff Dunham to reach down, scoop him up, and put him on his knee.

Anonymous said...

In my 8th week of P90X. I thought it was just me, almost killed the video player with a dumbell. I just play the music (which sucks) along with the cues, but I still can't stand the stupid pointless comments. ???Do we love our little yuppie selves??? Any work out associated to Dreya feels like some homeless drunks fabricated them. I use all of this as fuel to get through it.

Anonymous said...

His dad's name is Tony too, not Joel.

Anonymous said...

Look at Sophias teeth, like chicklets!!

Anonymous said...

I like during one of the cool downs they're doing the pot stirring one of the guys says he has menudo. Tony doesn't really know how to respond so he just says 'Nice'.

Anonymous said...

Whoever said we should "respond Rocky Horror style" - omg hilarious!!!
I'm gonna try that today... of course, I won't be able to 'breathe people' because I will be rolling on the floor laughing.

Thanks all for your comments - I thought I was the only one thinking there were some crazy comments. So glad I found this page today!!!

Unknown said...

Linda Blair, Tony. Her name's Linda Blair. You've asked that question once a week for the past six months, and I can't believe you still can't remember her name. It's Linda Blair.

Unknown said...

I love when Tony says, "Get your bucket nearby my friends."

It makes me feel good about feeling nauseaus. :)

Unknown said...

In Kenpo, during one of the breaks, Tony says "I'm too tired to talk" and then later says "Aint't no tired!"

And on the stretch, Pam is too high on her ankle stretch, so he tells her to get lower, then tells her to get her knees off the ground, so she goes right back to where she started, and he says, "Good." I also like it when he's in Pam's face asking if she can feel the stretch, and she's trying to answer and he keeps up with the "I got a mic right here, they can hear you" and she's visibly annoyed, "Yeah, I can feel it." almost with her teeth gritted.

Anonymous said...

In the chest and back video he want us to see how to do the back flys. He says, "Do you wanna see gorgeous?" points out to his face and says, "No, not this, but see how I put my shoulders together."

Anonymous said...

Tony is such a legend my favourite tonyism is when he is doing push ups or something and says time for a break, break over without having a actual break.

Anonymous said...

Early in Chest/Shoulders/Triceps is a closeup of Linda's chest, ample and full. I am transfixed.

The first time I read through all these comments I LMAO. The second time, however, the sharp edges began to stick out.

It has to be mostly women ripping on Dreya -- she's ultra-fit, and I'll bet she kills in a black evening dress.

Likewise it must be a woman who said Sofia is ugly -- no guy would ever say that.

And Katie in Back and Biceps? I think she's a sweetheart. I'd marry her (and Audra, and Shawna...).

Does anyone besides me wonder if Adam, the fittest person in the videos, is a ringer -- that he wasn't in the test group? With enough yoga and dance you may not *need* P90X.

David said...

This site is absolutely hilarious!

All of my faves have been mentioned but in Kempo X:

"DNA removal"

Bring it!

Anonymous said...

It's just 15 seconds, come on 15 seconds, let me see 15 seconds....

Right now he's writing down Never do pull ups with Toney again....

Anonymous said...

Does anyone else find it racist that Tony calls Black Pam Blam? BL(ack)(p)AM??

Anonymous said...

In Core Synergistics:

"Lets' look at Drey. She's got a banana."

Anonymous said...

In Yoga...when he goes up to Shauna and says to us that if we are feeling it and want to straighten our leg to ease up, we can...then Shauna does it and he says..."Shauna wants to...it's ok by me!" No more than 5 seconds later he looks over at Daniel Haas and says, "Get down there in Warrior 2 Mr. Haas, this is Yoga X my brother".

Anonymous said...

Didn't have time to read everything here, but apparently Adam..."he's a dancer...he's a wild man". I think there are certain things you need to be able to do to be a dancer (self-explanatory), but Tony, what exactly is the criteria for being a "wild man"? And next time you go to give Adam a Yoga block, no need to talk to him all quiet and sensitive like his cat just died..."Here ya go dude. Here ya go, man"

Amber said...

"Tony walks in from the back, acting all macho, slowing saying, "Ab.... Ripper... X..." For whatever reason I hate that."

It bugs me so much that I skip that next exercise and just end with the Russian Twists. I usually mute him now and just listen to music while he babbles on with his nonsense.

Anonymous said...

Yoga is winding down. Happy Baby. Shavasana. Lotus posture with OMs. Namaste. Tony for once is almost quiet. We're feeling the glow. The lights in the studio dim. All is peace. Then...

BOOM-BA-BOOM!
WANNA GET INTO SHAPE?!
I'LL HELP YOU!

And I scramble for the Mute Button...

Anonymous said...

As a dude who finished P90X, i need more than just losing weight as motiviation.....so I use other things.
Sophia - When she takes off her sweatshirt in Legs/Back. Amazing
Pam - Doing pretty much anything in Plyo. Best body on the show.
Dreya - When she smuggles raisins during the warmup on Arms/Shoulders
Audra - Mason Twists
Audra - Yoga
Katie and that old chick from Back/Biceps are gross

Anonymous said...

Great point on the end of the yoga video..."Want to get into shape?" And along with that...I can't stand this guy..."...the ability to lift large shrubbery" You know he's trying to impersonate Arnold there, and it's just awful.

Then, I wouldn't have noticed this normally because I'm usually in the midst of pain while doing heels to the heavens, but I always thought Tony looked visibly pissed for some reason at the end of that exercise when he transitions to, and says, "V Up Roll Ups". I finally watched the tv as I was doing my heels to the heavens and I think it's because he's annoyed with jason (he's the king, the ripped king) because he is totally unable to keep his legs straight during the heels to the heavens, thus setting a bad model for us to follow. Call me crazy...

Anonymous said...

I can't believe no one has mentioned the fact that at the end of yoga x during quad stretches he starts quoting Forrest Gump:

(fake southern accent) "I got shot...in the but-tocks. They say it's a million dollar wound but I haven't seen a dime...Release!"

Anonymous said...

Lean in here Johnny, cuz I'm gonna show you perfection my brother...no not this, my back...

So many others, but this annoys me haha

Anonymous said...

Ever notice during AbRipperX where Tony gets caught up with checking out form and they needed to edit in his voice? Listen carefully to when he says "That's 15...16" on Fifer scissors.

Or how about the way he says "to-geth-er" during some back stretches.

Anonymous said...

Something is wrong with you guys who don't like Dreya. I would so do her. She has a hot body. That stomach and butt is out of this world. Yes, she is socially awkward. But, omg... I bet she is hot in bed!

Anonymous said...

Has anyone noticed in the shoulders and arms vid when he asks what kind of soup they are stirring? The guy with the long hair and bandana gets ignored when he repeats himself a couple times saying his lol.

I love P90X.. I thought I was the only one laughing at Tony's cheesy quotes.

Anonymous said...

-core synergistics

And why do they call it the Dreya roll?... Cuz this crazy broad right here introduced it to me.

-cardio x

Keep it smooth and clean...you're tight and smooth and clean.

Anonymous said...

"Heels to the heavens" with a lisp and gay face cracks me up.

"Ceiling tiles!!!"

"You're a football herooooooo!!!"

Anonymous said...

Best part is the intro for Kempo X. Tony put his hands up in a blocking positino as he gets done talking and then the camera angle changes. He then rotates his head like a terminator with this real odd expression on his face. I laugh every time.

dewbert said...

way too many comments to check them all, but lots of folks are complaining about the mindless banter throughout. if you have the dvds, you can simply change the audio track; there are four, and two of them only include tony's position/exercise change notices.

Anonymous said...

Really? No one has mentioned the discomfort experienced when he does his whole 'do you have tickets to the show?', Katie: "What show Tony", Tony (flexing) : "The gun show".

Anonymous said...

"Bobby....doggin' it"

Annoying corncob girl says "damn" and Tony gets pissed, as he should, saying "say ouch."

Anonymous said...

Tony and his workout crew don' bother me, it's that Herby the Denist looking, used car salesman, cheesebag of a slef proclaimed "nutrition expert" that comes on after the vids hawking the recovery drink and fitness bars, etc who really pisses me off. Anybody else want to punch this A**holes lights out ?

Anonymous said...

lmao. when doing arm circles, morraine's face! it's priceless!

Anonymous said...

"Now that's the face, of a girl workin' hard."


Pull-Up Boy.

Anonymous said...

Tony definitely gets cheesy at times, but his goal is to keep us motivated enough to keep on going. In the beginning, I was grateful he never stopped talking;then I didn't have to think about how much pain I was in. Now I'm in week three and it grates a little. But hey, mission accomplished for him... I did make it to week three.

Anonymous said...

This collection of quotes is incredible.

Pretty much everything's been mentioned already.
I always feel really bad for Dave when Tony calls him "Sean" TWICE in the chest, triceps, back workout.

Also, thought everyone would appreciate this little gem:
http://fitzaang.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/tony-horton-robot-dance.jpg

Erik Stever said...

I'm not sure if anyone else wrote this, but one of the most shocking discoveries I made while doing Chest/Back was when Tony says, "Fiefer is fighting for a spot" (signaling to the floor space in front of the back guy that he should be looking at while doing his push ups).

Shocking Discovery: Fiefer licks Tony's hand while he is down there. No lie. It happens. Tony doesn't even flinch.

Tim said...

I always get thrown off in the legs and back (I think) when they're doing the alternating pull ups. Tony asks Dreya how many she is going to do and she says 15. It's two front, two back. Which one are you only going to do one on? Drives me nuts every time!

Anonymous said...

Ok has anybody else noticed in the Legs & Back video when they are on their third round of calf raises, when Dreya is making moaning noises each rep and Tony's like .."uh..that sound back there" Hahah

And in the Yoga X video when he tells Shawna to straighten her leg for relief and she kinda stumbles and Tony says "OK. . .get it back together" almost like he's pissed at her for falling haha

I cannot stand when Dreya says the "sanity clause" line..my husband and i just look at each other in disgust.

Also it kinda annoys me in legs and back on the first set of wall squats when tony has to give his whole schpeal about the recovery drink .. like my legs are on fire i don't wanna hear about you trying to sell the recovery drink!!!

this blog is awesome guys ive been cracking up reading these

Anonymous said...

On the Yoga X workout, has anyone else noticed the "camel toe" on Audra at the 27:18 mark?

Anonymous said...

lol all these corny lines r funny, and i think the chick in ab ripperx is hotter than the dentist.

Anonymous said...

My two favorites:

In three or four of his videos, Tony transistions by saying "we have two legs, let's do the other side"... Including Plyometrics with the guys who only has one leg.

When you do side stretch in Yoga X, Tony says "If this looks familiar, that 'cause it's on the cover"...but it's not. It's on the cover for X Stretch.

I also hate how I can balance fine in Twisting Prayer lunge in both Yoga and Kenpo UNTIL Tony says "you might tumble here." Curse you Tony! Haha.

Anonymous said...

Superman, banana, superman, banana, suuuuuperman.

Without a doubt, my favorite Tony-ism.

Have to say the stuff works though. Then again, what 1.5 hour workout done every day but one wouldn't?

Anonymous said...

I've done P90X and just finished P90X PLUS which are follow up routines to P90X. In one of the warm ups, Tony says to grab your wrist and let your arm stick out like a chicken wing. Then he mimicks the viewer by saying "WHAT????" implying that it sounds unusual to the viewer. What makes it so stupid is the fact that if you're doing P90X PLUS, you've already seen the stretch in P90X. Also, I do get tired of the corny stuff and the music so I pick the cues only version. Even in that the editing of the sound leaves in too much commentary.

Anonymous said...

I am doing P90X for the second time and I have noticed dramatic results. I'm not sure why everyone hates on Tony. I actually like the jokes he makes. And Dreya? Have you not seen her in Shoulders and Arms. She has a prime body haha. My two favorite quotes from Tony are…

In Shoulders and Arms: Tony says, "I did 24! If any of you did 25 I'm coming to your house!"

In Plyometrics: (While on a water break) Tony walks back and says, "Ahh shit, oh! I mean jeepers hahah."

Anonymous said...

my husband and I always chuckle during the warm up in plyo when tony says, " lets stretch the other leg because we got 2" while the camera is on the guy with the prosthetic.

Anonymous said...

"KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDS" - really high voice

"We're doing 40, we might even do some extra " ( sticks tongue out)

Respect and love to Tony he's a legend !

Anonymous said...

Ever notice in the Back and Biceps video he calls David "Sean"? (the substitute teacher)

Ron said...

Dude, Wesley the white guy in Kenpo X pisses me off every time I do that workout. When Tony says to do a horse stance he is practically standing straight up. He's also the only one frequently getting drinks of water. He also looks like he's barely even trying. I can do the whole freaking Kenpo workout w/o even needing a sip of water and I'm not even that tired. This Wesley fool is a disgrace to Kenpo and he's supposed to be a dope Karate man. PUHLEEAZE! Work on endurance, man.

Ron said...

In Yoga, Adam (black guy) falls out of his stretch and Tony goes "ain't no thang." LOL. Would he have said that if Adam was white?

Anonymous said...

Wow! No one mentioned my fav Tony quote!

"So if you ever get incarcerated, this is what you'll do in your tiny little box. I'm gonna demo one..."

Anonymous said...

My friend and I just finished day 60 today and all these comments are great. The one that kills me is after about 40 minutes of yoga x, Tony says, "Congratulations, the hard work is over(pause) sort of" This kills us because he has a little smurk on his face and you know he is talking about yoga belly 7 later. Also, at one point when you are doing leg stretches in yoga he says, "Adam....I mean add the arms, not Adam back there"

Here are a few more just in case people missed them earlier

"It gives an internal massage of the CNS, at least that is what I am told...heck I believe it"

"If you need a break, go ahead and take it...we'll be here"(Anybody else feel like a lazy piece of shit now)

"Nice muscles dude"

Anonymous said...

What about in Chest, Shoulders, and Triceps when he calls Dave/Davey Shawn?

Also, have you seen the p90x comedy videos?

This one says that Tony did standup for 7 years: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D91hJLAUS2w

Tony's own funny clips:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRzi-0yF_k4

This video has practically all the lines mentioned here in it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pUk2-xCZNM0

Also, this sketch comedy of P90x is my favorite.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2u1sz8ULp6Y

Ron said...

The little girl at the end of the beachbody commercial going "beachbody dot come." First of all, it's COM and not "come." Second, we all know you did not do P90X. There's no way in hell that a little girl at your age can do corn cob pullups or the cradle in Yoga.

lol ok in all honesty I don't find that little girl cute. Beachbody shoulda just stuck to adults only. I know I sound like an ass, but it's just my opinion!

Anonymous said...

Hilarious thread. Don't think this one has been mentioned yet. In Yoga X when it's the yoga belly x section and everyone's got their legs in the air, Tony says something like "Oh, we've got shaking going on! Look, ring ding ding ding ding ding ding" Is that the sound that a shaking leg makes Tony? Makes me laugh though.

Anonymous said...

Great thread.

One of my favs is during the chest and back video.

"During this first round, remember to PACE yourself.... OK pullups, let's go, MAXIMUM REPS!"

Suzel said...

I am just starting P90X and so day one of it is over for me. phew what a work out. I"m looking forward to losing all this extra fat that I got. I'm not a big ball, I have shape... But I wanna be toned and lean. I'm gonna finish p90x. My older brother who is basically fit as heck, is going to buy p90x2. O_0

Anonymous said...

Love P90X...one thing i find disturbing in core synergistics is that they are already holding plank for about 10 seconds in the bonus round when tony goes "5,4,3,2 and hold."

Anonymous said...

"Ab ripper X: I hate it, but I love it."

Anonymous said...

Tony is royally gay and if he’s banging anyone, it’s Phil in the Chest, Shoulders and Triceps workout. At least he wants to, if Phil will let him.

Jake said...

"That's a short uncle."

Harry D said...

LOL - this is awesome. My neighbor and I are on week 4. I love getting in his face with Tony's cheesy comments. One of my personal favs:

"I like fancy hands here"

Introducing Eric in Legs & Back we have a dispute as to whether he says he's all "gristle" or all "crystal" I say "gristle," but that doesn't really make sense - isn't that fat?

Anonymous said...

These are all so funny to me.

My husband and I have finished 1 round of P90X and started our 2nd round.

Tony is a crack-up and very much like Michael Scott whoever said that!

I just wanted to add a few little things...

1) Everyone makes Gumbi look like the tin man... (He said it about a couple people)

2) Adam is a dancer and a wild man, and the other dude from Plyo is just a wild man.

3) In Ab ripper X Jason has his arms up the WHOLE time but Tony only said Adam is crazy when he put his arms up when Tony comes to him. Poor Jason.

4) Why does he call Jason Mick? (The Mick's making contact, elbow thigh)

5) We did Plyo today- and he says in his high voice- "repeat that, uh-huh... yeahhhh" it is so whiney and funny. haha

I noticed everything you guys have said here. It's so funny. I LOVE this workout and Tony makes it pretty entertaining.


One last thing... Ab Ripper X totally needs more cowbell!

Anonymous said...

Guess what we're gonna do now?

Repeat that!

aahh huuuhhhhh!!


eeYeeesssssss!!!

Anonymous said...

WOW, so many nitt-picky judgemental comments here and we don't know anything more about these guys/gals than what we see in the vids!!!!!
Tony: "Don't smash yourselves in the face people . . . OK? Let somebody else do that"
Tony: "Two words . . recovery drink"
Me: "Three words . . .Audra's sweaty breasts" (Ab Ripper X, Mason Twist)
. . . .and to all those posters complaining about Wesley's flabby body? I would love to personally introduce you to him and then you could say it to his face and then take a swing, or a kick at him. The guy is a monster and not flabby.

Anonymous said...

I love Dreya. I think most of you are just a tad jealous of her. Sure Sophia is beautiful but her form is awful. This is a workout video - why are so many of you watching to the point you can actually count the number of reps each person does? I am way too busy doing my own reps.
Cheesy yes but damn effective.
I would take this video series over any of the others out there.

Anonymous said...

Diamonds of Gold............

Anonymous said...

While doing the circles with your arms in reverse, hands down. Tony says "Like a taradactle backing out of trouble... Cacaw Cacaw!!!!!"

This site is awesome.

Anonymous said...

In describing Phil, "La Machina"

Anonymous said...

Come on Joe Bavino!!! Love that line.. Or how about during Kempo x stretch he says" oh that's good mommy"

Anonymous said...

Ab Ripper X - When at the end Tony says:" Core, slash, abs workout" he makes the slash hand movement when he says abs. Maybe it is just me... but I really find it funny.

Most annoying is when the guy says during ab ripper x a couple of times the workout is almost over and it makes him say or it is a bummer. I am just dying here man! Have some respect!

Orhan said...

Tony is the man

In yoga x: "don't bite your toe" and "I reccomend you a foot spray".

Hony Torton said...

"Scissor... get it?..."

Anonymous said...

she is gymnast, an aerielist, married to ned farr, and was in a movie called the gymnast which shows off her acrobatic abilities.....was also in a marine story, ohhhh my her abs!

Anonymous said...

I ve done the P90X program twice already and it is awesome. Tony Horton is great and despite the once in a while funny schtick and one liners, I find this a great workout program. He has some really good workout partners in the videos and like most, I find Drea somewhat annoying . However, she is in great shape and I really dont mind her very much. The one really irritating and annoying person is Katie. Not so much that she is not gifted physically, but more so she has a whinny, nasal ,snickering attitude and voice and she cheats on her reps. Saw a few times that she stops working out when the camera is not on her and she uses a chair to cheat,especially on the corn cob pull ups. The other two guys that are on the DVD give you inspiration to do better, but Katie is the worse. Surprised Tony picked her to participate in P90X as he always chooses really good workout partners for his videos.

Anonymous said...

"I don't believe in aggge... I don't believe in aging."

"If you need breaks, take em... we're doing 25 a pop!"

Anonymous said...

Audra in yogaX is so beautiful.

Anonymous said...

"Whats up towel Boy? Are you toweling off already? Holy cow."

"Man oh manischevas"

Anonymous said...

Just finishing week 4 and found this, absolutely hilarious.

I think Tonys great. Love his little comments and whatnot.

Sophia, Audra and Shawna are beautiful. And while I'm not a big Dryea fan she's is "fit as a fiddle"

I like on the lying down tricep extensions, I think he says "Don't smash your face, let someone else do that". o_O

Anonymous said...

My favorite is "I think I ripped my pants." And yes, Dreya is annoying. Love the workout. Also love all these comments after reading them I laughed so hard " I think I ripped my pants." CAAAAAAAW! Pteradactyl backing out of trouble! Thanks to everyone for making my day!

Mike said...

They're working hard and that's what I wanna see YOU do.

Mike said...

And...

"Pure DNA removal!"

Anonymous said...

This blog looks like it's been around a while but I just stumbled onto it. This stuff is great, I love reading all these comments and looking for some funny stuff I've been missing!

Just started my second round of P90X, and I still feel bad when Tony says near the end of the warm-ups/stretching in Plyo "Ok, lets stretch the other leg 'cause we've got two of them." Dude, the guy directly to your right doesn't have two of them, way to rub it in.

Also, anyone look at the bonus workouts that come on P90X's "How to Bring It" DVD? I did one the other night just to change it up a little, I think it was called cardio intervals or something. Dreya Weber is in that one too and she could not have picked a worse outfit to wear. Specifically her top. At first I could not believe it was her, not a good look. The workout looked older and a bit dated, and Tony avoided saying Dreya's last name at all costs, almost like he was told not to reveal her identity or something. Once he even said out loud something like "I almost slipped, I cant say your last name." It was wierd, esp since he is all about the Dreya love in P90X and says her full name all the time.

Anonymous said...

How about...

"Fifer..is fighting for" as he and Scotty Fifer chuckle..

"It's Xlike, Not Ex-Lax, that's something completely different..."

The old lady saying "I'm feeling it" as they are doing the arm circles in Chest, Triceps and shoulders...

Anonymous said...

When in the triceps video with dave, phil and the older lady Tony calls dave "Shawn". AND that Katie is the most annoying human to ever exist. She contantly kisses Tony's butt. also doing corn cobs on a chair doesn't impress anyone. Plus she is way to flabby to be on a work out video. "Tickets to what, Tony?" GRRRRRR

Bababooey said...

Kenpo around min 26-27, Tony says:"I'm jacking and traveling."

Anonymous said...

You didn't look like this when you started out did you?

No, I looked like Bobby.

Anonymous said...

i looked up dreya...she is a bad ass. she is in cirque du soleil or something similar...yes, she is an aerialist (and a good one). as for her "spastic" jumping around, i suspect that she has some martial arts background or has done some fighting by the way she moves her feet. i suspect that most of the ones that make all the disparaging comments are men who's butt she could easily kick. just sayin.

Anonymous said...

Nobody mentioned the questionably gay statement in plyometrics, when he says, "speed isn't your friend here, but depth is. I'm going deep, yeah, (grunting noise) you're going to feel this in your butt in the morning!"

Anonymous said...

I hate ab ripper x and I hate the hidden ab workout Yoga belly 7. I just twisted my body in ways it doesn't twist and I start to cool down and feel better during the stretches and then I gotta do that crap. Plus it's 1 1/2 hours and you throw that crap in there!!

Anonymous said...

Have any of you seen the behind the scenes footage of P90x? Dreya actually showed Tony alot of different moves she has used for workouts. She is annoying to watch over and over again for some reason, but I wonder how much she contributed to the actual workout.

Anonymous said...

...because variety is the spice of life!" ever time I hear that, my wife and dogs can hear me mocking him across the opposite side of the house!!

I can't stand doing the twist or Mctwist and after 40 he throws in some kind of whaling sound. It bothers me so much I can't finish so I either finish before them or turn down the volume!

Nevertheless it a great resource and I feel he genuinely wants the viewers to be successful.

Anonymous said...

In legs and back at the end when they're doing the soup thing, Eric (the guy in the green tank top) says "Pumpkin, pumpkin, how about pumpkin?" and nobody hears him!

Makes me laugh every time!

Anonymous said...

(Pick your exercise) "the mother of" (whatever he adds on here)

One man band man band said...

Great vids. Love 'em.
Tony and dreya probably tried sex because they're both gay and wanted to see what it's like with perfect specimens of the opposite sex.
Otherwise, noting new to add. Unless no one commented on the cut during the third set of x's in kenpo. That wasn't ten!
Suck it, Tony LatiMo'!

Anonymous said...

I haven't seen this mentioned yet...

In one of the videos, Tony mentions that someone is "pure gristle, from head to toe" meaning it as a compliment. BUT in another video, he says something like "Gonna burn off some goop, some goo, some gristle, that nasty stuff." So which is it Tony? Is gristle bad, or good???

Anonymous said...

I am just starting P90X. The workouts are really good old school stuff I did in elementary and highschool. I like all the girls and guys. None of them bug me. BUT...I can't stand tony. don't like to listen to him. So I have been pausing the DVD with each new exercise just so I won't have to listen to him. I then skip to the next one when I'm finished. I think I will start keeping a list of the exercises and skip the DVD. One other thing...Maureen has been in porn. I have seen her in two vids already. She is also on the porn site Blacks on Blonds. Scroll down to the bottom and look for Mauren. That is the name she is using. She is a brunette in the pics but you can easly tell it is her. also, Wikipedia has Dreya Webber listed as omnisexual...whatever that is.

Anonymous said...

actual dna removal....it comes out all over the place. Hmmmmm.

Anonymous said...

My favorite moment is during one of the cool-downs. Everyone is doing the hugger move. Tony is saying, “Love your self.” Then he gets a gleam in his eye. He edges over to Dreya and says, “Love your neighbor.” They both do a perfectly synchronized and sweaty double-hugger slap around each other. Great fun!

Anonymous said...

Favorite motivational quotes: "Thirty seconds. You can do ANYTHING for 30 seconds, right?" Also, "Do your best and .... Forget the rest." I usually supply a different F word while I'm struggling with the workouts.

Anonymous said...

"Chest, Shoulders, Triceps
Tony: Big Phil, you feeling the burn?
Phil: No"
Isn't Phil the lawyer? They only lie when their lips are moving!

Anonymous said...

@ Anonymous 10:37

You are 100% right about both Dreya cheating on the side tri raises and the guy at the back of the plyo DVD! I spotted both of those instantly and they both annoyed the hell out of me for the very same reasons!

Anonymous said...

After the second round of rock star hops in Plyo, there's a brief shot of Tony looking completely wasted and saying, "My god". I always feel a little better about myself after seeing that.

Brad said...

Hilarious.. I just started (day 4) - and finding this makes me actually look forward to the stupid comments!

Anonymous said...

At some point Tony says: "Semper Fi, I shouldn't say that, I was never a Marine."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semper_fidelis

I think you're safe Tony.

P.S. Pam IS Blam!!! Dreya's not that bad, leave her be. The only real pain is Corn Cob Katie. Puppy love anyone?

Anonymous said...

I love to scream at everyone in the house: "Hit my HANDS. HIT my HANDS."
Don't be a hero, dont let your ego get in the way. I'm going to lift 45 because I can't let you guys lift more than me.
How about when "you go to bridge and all the heros go to wheel" and you can see everyone's junk.
Tony almost startd to play with himself with his shirt up after plow.
One two three four, 1234fibe6.

Anonymous said...

P90X is great. Done it twice and have had many people comment about my body.

"It's a beautiful thang"

"Other ways, otherwise, rock n roll"

how many calories should I eat said...

Its amazing and inspiring to know this info. It is helping me a lot. It became a life style for me know and am really enjoying it. thanks...

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