Friday, October 15, 2004

10/15/04 Stupid People

It must be the cold rainy weather. But I've just sort of run across a theme of really disgustingly stupid articles, conversations and webpages today. In order to get them off of my chest, I've decided to post them. To steal a quote from my favorite writer, The Sports Guy, of ESPN - "Man, I hate everybody right now. I feel like Barry Bonds."

An AP News analyst writes "Gas Prices Jump With Oil Prices". Brilliant analysis. Now I realize why I'm unemployed and this nimrod works for AP.

For only $995 you can overcome your porn addiction. It probably goes without saying that this will also require you to take Jesus Christ the Savior into your life as well. I don't think I should go because Jesus kind of turns me on.

Google Nicki also writes to complain about bathroom etiquette and sent me this straight shooting website. She also sent me a link to the new Google Desktop. Her selling point was "Trust me. It's cool." Actually it's making big news lately about how it blows away your normal Windows search, and will find just about anything you've seen on your screen - Emails, IMs, documents, Jesus porn.

I know my facts are usually pretty short and to the point. But the topic of "Stupid People" has really got me going. So I continue on the topic of Undecided Voters. How could you possibly be undecided at this point? No two presidential candidates in my lifetime have been as different as these two guys. Next time you're in line for some ice cream and the douchebag in front of you gets nine samples and can't decide between choco-mocha fudge and cappu-choco swirl, shove a frosty metal scooper up his ass. He represents the "undecided" demographic.

Let me end on a less downtrodden note. Everyday Electoral-Vote.com updates the status of the latest polls from each state, and displays who would win the election based on those polls. As of today, Bush is winning 284-228. 270 is the magic number of electoral votes (EVs) needed to win the whole damn thing. According to the site, 26 EVs are tied, 30 EVs are barely in Kerry's favor and 62 EVs are barely in Bush's favor. I can't friggin' wait for all of the riots and protests on election day.

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