After 3 years of playing half court basketball, I finally figured out how to describe my game. It's "deceptively mediocre". I walk out there and the opposition thinks - hey, not only can we put our worst defender on him, but we can also double team the good guy and leave him open. That's when my mediocrity kicks into 2nd gear. Since I lose defenders often, I tend to get more open shots than most players. One day recently, I was actually hitting my open shots. To which one guy intended to compliment me by saying, "You're the Mike Bibby of open jump shots". His buddy said, "What's that supposed to mean? That's a terrible comparison. Mike Bibby is like the 73rd best open jump shooter in the NBA." He basically said that I'm the Michael Bay of movie direction. Or the Fred Armisen of SNL cast members. And that's the best compliment I've ever received on a basketball court. Thank you. Thank you very much.
There are two hallucinogenic plants that grow in the Sinai desert. Which leads to the question - Was Moses high when he brought down the 10 Commandments?
Damn my New Year's Resolution. I feel bad even posting this, despite it's equal opportunity funny-ness.