10/30/07 Body My Holding Cell

Remember using the Erlenmeyer Flask in high school chemistry? It was named after Richard August Carl Emil Erlenmeyer. My first thought was - how much would that suck that your greatest scientific accomplishment yielded a certain shaped flask? Then I thought - Wait, that's way more than any of the rest of us can say. So here's to you Mr. Erlenmeyer and your 4 first names. Well done. Well done, indeed.

-----

I hate to admit that the only new TV show I've watched this season is "The Big Bang Theory". I wanted so badly for the show to be good. It's not. I'm amazed it's still on the air. Not only is it not good, but I can't imagine it's going anywhere. But I keep watching it. At the end of my DVR recording, I noticed a real quick screen that lasted all of a half second and I assumed it was long copyright deal. But I accidentally paused it there and read the first sentence. It was anything but. It was hilarious. You may know this, but I sure didn't - Chuck Lorre productions has vanity cards after every show they air. The one that caught my eye was number 191. And it read:

I'm writing this vanity card at six o'clock in the morning on October 18, 2007. It's my birthday. I am fifty-five years old. I have long ago become invisible to young women. They actually do not see me. But I am not writing this to complain. I am at peace with my circumstances. The blessing of fifty-five is a libido in decline. The curse of it is that major pharmaceutical companies are successfully exploiting my insecurities. Suddenly that surreal commercial of a silver-haired guy sitting naked in an outdoor bath tub and holding hands with a naked, slightly younger woman in an adjacent tub makes perfect sense (if I had produced that spot I would've have given him a small plasma screen TV so he could watch ESPN during his hang time). I'm also mesmerized by the commercial featuring middle-aged men gleefully celebrating their ability to drink water and drive long distances (I particularly enjoy that the slightly younger women in that one are turned on knowing that their geezers don't have to urinate frequently). Anyway, it's my birthday today. If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go suck on my bronchitis inhaler so that later today I can blow out the candles without hacking up a lung.

-----

Since nobody else cares about Guitar Hero but me, I'll give a real, real quick follow up on the initial review:

The bassist is Cousin It.

I still can't beat 2 songs. One of the songs is Metallica's "One". The worst part is that it's easy to get about 78% of the way through the song. Then there's the solo. I can't, for the life of me, figure out a way to do this....



The other song I can't pass is Slayer's "Raining Blood". Ridiculous I tells ya.



-------

And finally... I'm not a fan of college sports. At all really. But I saw 2 things this past week that were fantastic.

First, The University of Georgia football team storming the field when they scored first against Florida. They were penalized, but the coach directed them to do it.



Second, the Trinity play...