When you're done reading, go back to WWW.NACHOSRULE.COM, The World Where Nachos Rule.
To add this blog as an RSS feed, use http://nachosrule.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default?alt=rss.
A 5.6 earthquake hit Northern California yesterday. CNN was immediately on the scene with this picture.... of 10 shampoo (moisturizer?) bottles on the floor. And you thought Halloween was scary enough by itself.
-----
I've mentioned this before, but one of my favorite baseball stories is about Dock Ellis. He's the guy that dropped acid on June 12, 1970 in Los Angeles, then his girlfriend told him that he had to pitch that day in San Diego. He proceeded to throw a no hitter and has little to no recollection of the game.
What I didn't know about Dock Ellis is the following (From Wikipedia):
Attempting to hit every batter in the Cincinnati Reds lineup on May 1, 1974. In an effort to prove a point to teammates, Ellis hit Pete Rose, Joe Morgan, and Dan Driessen in the top of the first. The clean-up batter Tony Perez avoided Ellis' attempts, instead drawing a walk, and after two pitches aimed at the head of Johnny Bench, Ellis was removed from the game by manager Danny Murtaugh. Ellis' box score for the game reads: 0 IP, 0 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 0 K.
Remember using the Erlenmeyer Flask in high school chemistry? It was named after Richard August Carl Emil Erlenmeyer. My first thought was - how much would that suck that your greatest scientific accomplishment yielded a certain shaped flask? Then I thought - Wait, that's way more than any of the rest of us can say. So here's to you Mr. Erlenmeyer and your 4 first names. Well done. Well done, indeed.
-----
I hate to admit that the only new TV show I've watched this season is "The Big Bang Theory". I wanted so badly for the show to be good. It's not. I'm amazed it's still on the air. Not only is it not good, but I can't imagine it's going anywhere. But I keep watching it. At the end of my DVR recording, I noticed a real quick screen that lasted all of a half second and I assumed it was long copyright deal. But I accidentally paused it there and read the first sentence. It was anything but. It was hilarious. You may know this, but I sure didn't - Chuck Lorre productions has vanity cards after every show they air. The one that caught my eye was number 191. And it read:
I'm writing this vanity card at six o'clock in the morning on October 18, 2007. It's my birthday. I am fifty-five years old. I have long ago become invisible to young women. They actually do not see me. But I am not writing this to complain. I am at peace with my circumstances. The blessing of fifty-five is a libido in decline. The curse of it is that major pharmaceutical companies are successfully exploiting my insecurities. Suddenly that surreal commercial of a silver-haired guy sitting naked in an outdoor bath tub and holding hands with a naked, slightly younger woman in an adjacent tub makes perfect sense (if I had produced that spot I would've have given him a small plasma screen TV so he could watch ESPN during his hang time). I'm also mesmerized by the commercial featuring middle-aged men gleefully celebrating their ability to drink water and drive long distances (I particularly enjoy that the slightly younger women in that one are turned on knowing that their geezers don't have to urinate frequently). Anyway, it's my birthday today. If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go suck on my bronchitis inhaler so that later today I can blow out the candles without hacking up a lung.
-----
Since nobody else cares about Guitar Hero but me, I'll give a real, real quick follow up on the initial review:
The bassist is Cousin It.
I still can't beat 2 songs. One of the songs is Metallica's "One". The worst part is that it's easy to get about 78% of the way through the song. Then there's the solo. I can't, for the life of me, figure out a way to do this....
The other song I can't pass is Slayer's "Raining Blood". Ridiculous I tells ya.
-------
And finally... I'm not a fan of college sports. At all really. But I saw 2 things this past week that were fantastic.
First, The University of Georgia football team storming the field when they scored first against Florida. They were penalized, but the coach directed them to do it.
Ok. I bought Guitar Hero III today. I was actually good and productive until about 4:30 this afternoon. Then I finally broke it out. Here are some of my initial reactions to the game. This is sort of going to be a running diary since I'm playing and writing between songs:
Unlike the previous 2 games, they completely redid the animation, the venues, the change screens, etc. And, so far, all for the better.
Lars Umlaut was always my favorite character. I like how he breathes fire during his star powered solos. In this game though... He dances a little 80's glam rock fruity-ish. I'm not so sure what happened.
I fired up expert mode. I got though the first set unscathed. I even got 5/5 stars on all but one song. Even in the 2nd set, I breezed my way through. And I was thinking of being all, "Look at me! I'm so good at this game! I can sight read and still get 96% on expert!"....
Then, at the end of set #2, there's a new piece of the game called "Battle Mode". It's like dueling banjos. But with electric guitars. Your first battle is with Tom Morello of "Rage Against the Machine". Let's just say that I got my ass handed to me on a platter. And I no longer care to brag about my freakish Guitar Hero skills.
The game is best played loud. The volume will actually make you play better.
Alright - It took me about 5 tries to beat that Tom Morello battle. The best way I can explain it is to compare it to multi-player Tetris. It's not necessary how well you do. But rather how much you can mess up the other person. The greatest part? When you win, you get to play "Bulls on Parade" with him. It's little things like that that make me love this game even more.
Some Thor/Zeus type character runs the tutorial. I don't quite understand why.
Ok, seriously. The Lars Umlaut dance is beyond distracting. I find myself laughing during the song. I may have to change to Axel Steel.
I changed to "Midori". I think she's a new character. That could be fun.
One song later - Midori's a terrible choice. She's all cutsie Japanese anime looking. That's not quite the "rock out" lead guitarist I wanted. Axel Steel it is.
This is nothing new. But the game has continued to give me an appreciation for bands that I otherwise don't find appealing. One, in particular, is "The Rolling Stones". I've never been a fan. I always thought that Mick Jagger's looks was the appeal. But playing some of the difficult rhythms has helped me understand why some people consider them one of the greatest bands ever.
The storyline in "Career Mode" makes a whole lot more sense this time around. I won't ruin the venues and the transitions for you. But they're fun.
It can't be coincidence that the encore songs are usually the best songs. Pearl Jam's "Evenflow"! Hells yeah!
I've made it to the 2nd battle. This time's against Slash. I've been bitched off stage 3 times already. The screen says "Man, is Slash taking advantage of you? Do you need a hug? Maybe you should stick to playing bass..." And it goes on taunting me.
With that, I'll end my GH3 review. And I'll move onto being more productive with my time.
------
My old high school physics partner, Jeremy send the "Don't Tase Me, Bro" weekend presented by 95.1 WILL Rock. My apologies for posting this at the very, very end of the weekend.
------
Do you play too much World of Warcraft?
-----
Dave Chappelle was right. Dialing 911 is scary. "Cuz they tape those phone calls".
Remember when Halloween used to be celebrated on October 31st? Yeah, well, what the hell happened? I'm not the most social cat around, and my Halloween plans began yesterday and are extending to the middle of next week. It's almost as if we've collectively decided to ignore "Holy" days (root of holiday, I would assume) and just use times like this to extend our debauchery instead.
Like I said, (and I'm repeating the obvious here), I ain't one of the cool kids. However, I've been invited to no less then FOUR Halloween PRE-parties this evening. That doesn't even include the "main" party or the post-(what usually turns into Guitar Hero fest) party. When did this happen? When did Halloween become the hugest day/weekend/week of the year? And when, for that matter, did the "slutty" costume fad begin? Question: What are you going to be for Halloween? Every girl: "Oh a sexy (fill in the blank)." By "fill in the blank", girls actually hear things like "cop, devil, french maid, cat". Things like that. Guy hear, "sexy...." and just start thinking of bras and panties in public. Actually, you know what? I'm asking the wrong questions here. The real question remains... Why don't we just do this all year long? You know... Have fun and dress slutty?
--------
Speaking of sluts and debauchery, the most useless and basisless (that seems like a word, right?) survey came out. When men are looking for random hookups, they hit on girls named Kelly the most. Tanya, Deb/Debbie, Becky and Steph round out the top 5.
-------
Super Mario Bros. and the original NES remain in full 20+ year retro force. For those that have played, you may enjoy "Bowser's Suggestion Box". It's a suggestion box from his "employees".
-------
I wish we'd see more of this on the news. Then I might actually watch.
Thanks to everyone who has called or emailed concerned about the wildfires. Even though I haven't personally been affected, there are many people who are. So, if you're into the prayer thing, they certainly need it. And if you're into keeping up to speed, Google Nicki sends current maps of the fires. I had been using this map on MSNBC. Here are some photos of the night sky in Newport Beach. In the meantime, it's very hot and hazy during the day, ash continues to fall from the sky and tonight, the moon is bright orange.
-----
VH1's "I Love the 90s" is on. It's the 1997 hour. Do you realize it's been 10 years since Chris Farley died?
Dumbledore is gay. If there's not already Harry Potter based porn, it won't be long now.
-----
Because MSN is the source for all truthiness... Here is the "real" cost of love. Over the course of a 50 year marriage, a man will spend, on average, $590,000 on his wife.
-----
During the World Series, Taco Bell is offering a free taco every time a player steals a base. Their promotional team could use this opportunity to capitalize on "When you're sliding into third..."
California is notorious for earthquakes, mudslides and wildfires. If, by notorious, you're referring to natural disasters. For a few years, I've gotten concerned emails and phone calls every time one of those natural disasters makes the news. In response, I normally laugh or have to explain that it isn't happening near me. But these wildfires seem much, much different and much more real.
Last night, I was out with a buddy. Around 8:00 pm, we left where we were and started walking to my car. Outside, it smelled like a campfire. Even though it was dark, you can see the smoke in the air. And pieces of ash were falling as we were driving home. We both agreed that this couldn't be from the Malibu fires we had heard about on the news earlier that day. There were "gale force winds" (minimum 32 mph) the entire day, which quickly spread the wildfires. The smoke we smelled and saw were much more local, as we had assumed. Airplanes were landing in the reverse direction since the fires were in the normal landing path. Every time a plane was on approach, their lights illuminated the smoke. The news said that the planes didn't have the minimum 3 mile visibility to allow for takeoffs. Only "emergency" landings were permitted.
Today, there is still a post-disaster feel outside. The air still smells like a campfire. Probably the eeriest part is that the sky is filled with haze. The sun is peeking through the haze on an otherwise cloudless day, giving everything an orange tint. Plus, it's unseasonably warm out due to the Santa Ana winds - which, coincidentally, are the cause of the fires in the first place. Today just seems extra quiet. Ash continues to fall from the sky. 250,000 people have so far been evacuated from the homes. And local wildlife preserves are still on fire, as are some residences.
I'm not writing this so that you'll worry about me. I'll be fine. The worst I'll suffer is some burning eyes and a charred smell to my clothes. Since I don't talk to many people during the day, I have no idea if the conditions outside are of much concern to anyone. But, to me, for what it's worth, it seems story worthy.
My first few childhood lessons were, in some order: Don't eat Play-Doh (despite it's salty, starchy deliciousness), there are nine planets in the solar system and after a nuclear war, the only animal to survive would be the cockroach. Mythbusters is taking on the final one. They're going to radiate cockroaches to nuclear holocaust levels and, uh, see what happens.
-----
Since my childhood memory of 9 planets has recently been downgraded to 8, we're going to play a Navigate the Planets game.
Welcome to the all-family contribution edition of "Something I Learned Today".
Cousin Eric sends - The Goonies "Where are they now?". I never would have expected that FracisFratelli would emerge as my favorite actor. Or at least be in the better movies.
----
My mom sends Snowball, the dancing Cockatoo.
----
My brother sends Van Canto doing Metallica's "Battery" acapella.
October 15th was "Blog Action Day". It's a day where bloggers are supposed to unite over one topic. This year's topic was the environment. So, here's my tardy take. The computer dust you breath while blogging is toxic.
-----
From the "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day" files: Hardee's introduces a 920 calorie breakfast burrito. I'm almost disappointed that they couldn't crack the 4 digit barrier.
-----
My parents asked me who Dane Cook was. And asked if they'd enjoy seeing him. I insta-called with a "NO". I figured my dad would recognize him from the baseball playoff promos. About a week ago, The Sports Guy did a podcast with Seth Meyers from Saturday Night Live. The Sports Guy suggested an SNL skit where someone impersonates Dane Cook during these baseball promos. And they did it. Kudos, Sports Guy. On a personal note, I recorded SNL this past week and watched it for the first time in probably 7 years. It was surprisingly good.
------
There's a video contest for some MLBActoberthingie. I don't know the rules. But I really enjoyed this one.
From the "So you're saying there's a chance" files: My brother has upped the ante in the family "next to get married" pool. (According to Bookie Barry, my odds are still holding steady at 6-1. And, to be perfectly honest, I still wouldn't bet on me.) Unless robot marriage gets legalized before the year 2050. Then I'm at least even money.
-----
I recently took lots of pre-employment tests for a local company. The first test was some personality test with hundreds of questions. I was told that I needed to pass that test before I could continue and take more tests. Most of the questions made no sense. "I would rather fix a car than go to the theater. Yes or No?" "Would you prefer designing a cake or learning advanced algebra?" I didn't quite know how to answer most of the questions. But there's one thing I know for sure.... Don't answer like this.
It must be that time of year. Rock Paper Scissor articles are sprouting up worldwide. RPS Juggernauts from New Zealand and Australia are vying to be the world champion.
-----
Some comic I saw recently and his stance on MySpace...
Saturday, Donny, is Shabbos, the Jewish day of rest. That means that I don't work, I don't get in a car, I don't fucking ride in a car, I don't pick up the phone, I don't turn on the oven, and I sure as shit don't fucking roll! Shomer shabbos!
Sister-in-law Christy mentioned a page of unnecessary quotations a couple of weeks ago. I "think" I found what she was talking about. Along the "same" lines, a page of lowercase L's.
------
South Park "still" has it...
------
It's not an "optical" illusion. It's an "audio" illusion. (Make sure to hit "replay" as soon as you can.)
Having solved all crimes and problems at home and abroad, the United States Congress passed House Resolution 697 yesterday. What is H.R. 697 exactly? "Commending Green Bay Packers quarterback Brett Favre for establishing a National Football League record for most career touchdown passes, and for other purposes."
Are you left brain or right brain dominant? Google Nicki sends a quick test. Look at the dancer. The page explains the rest. The messed up part? Earlier today, I was left brained and I couldn't get the right brain to work. When I just opened it now? I'm right brained. I just looked again. I was left brained for a few seconds. Then right brained again. Damn you, Google Nicki! Now I'm frustrated and confused. And apparently lacking that piece that separates the hemispheres.
We live in an age where information is available to us like never before. That's a given. Our phones store hundreds of numbers, to the point where it's unnecessary to memorize them. I personally still remember my childhood phone number. I even remember the area codes as they changed. And today? I'm not 100% sure I know my parents' current phone number by heart. Wired Magazine tackles this topic in an article called "Your Outboard Brain Knows All".
Now, I consider myself blessed with an above average memory. As a kid, I had a mental store of all sorts of information. Some of it remains today. Mostly the important ones. Like 007 373 5963. Even though I have a pretty good memory, I value resourcefulness far more. I would imagine that, in a workplace, a resourceful employee would be far more valuable than one who can memorize well. Unfortunately, in my experience, that's not the case. One of my frustrations with the people I've worked with and interviewed with is the focus on the memorization of details. During recent interviews, I have been constantly bombarded with the technical minutiae that rarely, if ever, applies to my job. While the interviewers are disappointed in the fact that I don't know the answer, I am disappointed in them too. Since the honest answer is, "Go to the reference library" or "Use Google and search on 'SQL Inner Join'". Within 2 minutes in the workplace, I would have the solution. That's resourcefulness. Instead, my lack of detailed memorization of syntax is viewed upon as incompetence.
A few years ago I read, "How Would You Move Mount Fuji?". It's a book that explores how innovative companies interview. Basically, companies like Google are more concerned with how you think and who you are. They could essentially care less what you've done. Why don't more companies interview this way? Do you think that most companies don't want to be innovative? Are they complacent hiring a bunch of "yes men"? Or do they lack the insight and talent to really interview well? I'm asking because I don't know. And because it frustrates me beyond belief.
The next product you'll likely see in SkyMall Magazine - The Daddle.
-----
Mike sends this great All Bran commercial. How many poop references can you find?
-----
To be perfectly honest, I feel bad that the Cubs played so badly in the playoffs. And not in the way you'd expect - Many of my friends and family members would have preferred to see them go up 3 games to nothing in the World Series, only to blow it. While I don't necessarily want to see them win it all, as a fan of the game, it's disappointing to see a division winner just roll over and die. Now that I've softened my stance on the Cubs, I don't feel so bad about posting this video.
"The Office" is back with new episodes. But "Scrubs" isn't. I got worried about "Scrubs". But it'll be back. On October 25th.
Science Fact o' the day: Remember Avogadro's Number from high school chemistry? 6.02x10^23? Just how big is that number? If you had that many unpopped popcorn kernels, the entire United States would be covered 9 miles deep.
A long, long time ago I said I was looking for all of DoogieHowser's end of episode pearls of wisdom. Then, just last night, my dad sends them to me. Every single one. Ok, maybe not every one. But enough of them to get me excited. I'm beginning to think that life has a 2-3 year waiting period on the "Ask and ye shall receive" policy. This would be evidence in favor of that theory.
-----
You'd like to think this would be the last time I'd mention Guitar Hero 3. But it probably won't be. Lebowski Fest Ryan sends the official list of GH3 song, in order. (On a side note, the plan is to go to Lebowski Fest on the 12th if you're interested in joining).
-----
I'm generally not a fan of pranks. They always seemed to be cruel, hurtful and at the expense of the innocent. This would be an exception - Only since these two guys have been in a "prank war" for the past year. Plus, this one was really creative.
-----
While I'm on a mean streak, I'm also generally not a fan of European basketball or people getting hurt. But, what the hell....
Science factoid of the day: One teaspoon of a neutron star weighs a billion tons.
------
When I fly, my mind wanders. Part of it is the solitude. Part of it is the altitude. And part of it is whatever is in the recycled air. I swear to you, the second the air comes on, I am completely relaxed and sedated. My dad thinks I hold the record for the number of times someone has fallen asleep before a plane takes off. This last trip I took, instead of sleeping I started writing down whatever was coming to mind on the sudoku page of the airline magazine. Here's what I have that I care to share:
Out of the 3 sudoku puzzles in the magazine, the easiest of the three was 2/3 filled in. The number 7 was written in twelve times.
Have you ever flown over an agricultural area? Why are the fields in circles instead of the entire square? By my calculations, you're losing 21.5% of your total field area (pi*r^2 compared to 2r*2r). There must be a reason to waste that much space.
SkyMall magazine is just ridiculous. The stuff is ridiculous. The prices are ridiculous. And, most of all, the models and their poses are ridiculous. The slanket? The travel pillow? The bumper boat? I don't care how many drugs they pump through the air system... There's no way those items have any appeal.
-----
I should have made my baseball announcement 3 or 4 weeks ago when I first decided. Since my team rolled over and died in May, I have my American and National League followings for the playoffs. Go Angels and Phillies! (I must like red). For more on the end of the season, I suggest Jason Starks' article. My favorite part is halfway down - It's the "Mathematical impossibility division" For example:
• Oakland's KikoCalero, July 12 in Minnesota: 2/3 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 0 K, 1 pitch.
-----
Radiohead is awesome and brilliant. That's a given. Mike confirms this. Radiohead is letting you decide how much you want to pay for their new album. Seriously. Pay what you think it's worth. Take that RIAA, scumbags.
A 5.6 earthquake hit Northern California yesterday. CNN was immediately on the scene with this picture.... of 10 shampoo (moisturizer?) bottles on the floor. And you thought Halloween was scary enough by itself. 
