Thursday, February 01, 2007

The Colts' Superbowl Shuffle

(Thanks to Charlotte Dan)

"The Official Colts Suck Shuffle"
Written and Sang by: Tom Kelly
(goes to the music of the original super bowl shuffle)
Tom Kelly Productions © 2007

We are the Colts, the losin' crew,
Losin' on down to the orange and blue,
The Bears are so good, we know their good,
Blowin' us out like you knew they would,
You know the Bears are #1,
#1 out of everyone,
We're not here to start no trouble,
We're just here to do the Loser of the Super Bowl Shuffle.

It’s Payton Manning, I like to dance
I see Brian Urlacher, I shit my pants
Critics say I can’t win the big game
Super Bowl 41 much of the same
Chicago’s defense is everywhere
Throw a pass, gets picked by a Bear
I didn’t come here lookin for trouble
We can’t win, no need to shuffle

I play receiver, it’s Reggie Wayne,
I catch the ball, Urlacher brings the pain,
Bears got a line we can’t run thru
Can’t complete a pass against the cover 2
Vashers and Tillman cover me long
Peyton throws me the ball, he is wrong
I get gator arms, I’m scared to get hit
Won’t see me after halftime, I’ll have quit.

Starting running back, Joseph Addai
Run up the middle? I’d rather die
I’m scared Ian, I’m scared of tank
We pass the ball, who do I thank?
Score a touchdown? I got no chance
Run away from that linebacker lance
I didn’t know I was gonna fumble
But now it’s time to let the bears do the shuffle

Defensive end Dwight Freeney,
I let Fred Miller dominate me
Couldn’t get pressure on the QB rex
Shoulda stayed home and had some sex
The bears dismantled me and the Colts,
They’d do the same to LT and the Bolts
The bears put on a show that you wanna see
Super Bowl champs from the NFC

Dallas Clark, number 44
One hit from Urlacher, I say no more
Bears are the greatest that’s no fib
Got hit by Hunter, broke a rib
I try to block or catch a pass,
But all I do is land on my ass,
Played college ball at Iowa,
Lovie’s the 2nd coming of Ditka.

It’s Cato June and I like to hump
T Jones made me look like a speed bump
Ran me over, gave a stiff arm
On run plays I cause no harm
Our defense looked like swiss cheese,
Holes everywhere, bears score as they please
400 yards did Thomas Jones amass
they the greatest crown there ass

It’s Hunter Smith, I punt the ball
Hester runs by me, then I fall
He’s got moves that are so sick,
Not to mention his 12 inch d*ck
We’re from Indiana nobody cares
This offseason wanna trade to the bears
We let down the rest of the AFC
A long term deal is needed for Lovie

Adam Vinatieri, I might as well quit
0-1 in the super bowl now I’m not a Patriot
I’m a pro bowler, but so is Robbie
And he’s a much better kicker then me
I left New England and I was torn,
Came to Indiana, all there is, is corn
I can’t kick outside, this is no RCA dome
Come on Dungy can we go home?

It’s Bob Sanders, I just got beat
Bernard runs by, I dive at his feet
Should wore sunscreen I just learned,
Play against the Bears, I’m sure to get burned
Rex throws the ball all over the place
Desmond catches the ball, stiff arms my face
I didn’t come here lookin to lose,
But after this beating, where is the booze?

Marvin Harrison, number 88
All season long I played so great
Then I got to super bowl 41,
How many catches? Can you say none?
Here it comes, Payton throws to me,
Opps there goes Vasher with pick number 3
We lost the battle, we lost the war
Time to pick my head up off the floor

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